I love being busy. I work, study full time, sell stuff on eBay, blog and look after my house and family. When I am having ‘quiet time’ I am usually planning a trip, inventing business ideas or creating something…my mind never stops. I want to achieve things and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
But mostly I find it hard to relax and be still. It is not that I am incapable of it, I spent years on the new age hippy path. In fact, my first career when I left school was as a massage therapist so relaxation was my expertise! I spent my days guiding executives and extremely busy, RICH people on how to take time out for themselves. More often or not, the successful, executive business people actually grasped this better than me.
I was just reflecting on this as I was reflecting on my own struggle for balance. The executives that I treated all seemed to actually be very ‘together’ and I am now thinking maybe that is why they are so powerful and successful and happy! Maybe they really do have it together and it is time for us to look upon those who seem to have it all and observe their attitudes, accomplishments as well as their mistakes and translate them into our own lives. Maybe we need to stop saying negative things like “They might be rich but are they happy?”. It seems to me that success and happiness is not just working your butt off but also an attitude thing.
Every successful executive I met:
- Always welcomed me with a smile, a handshake and asked ‘how are you?’. They were always polite and ALWAYS left me with a gift as I walked out the door. Whether it was a bottle of wine from the mini bar, a cash tip or their business card along with the words, “If there is anything you need…”. Thinking back now, I wish I could do it all over again. I was so carefree and relaxed and didn’t understand how incredible the opportunity for networking was! The lesson : smile, say hello, shake hands, ask ‘how are you’ with genuine interest, listen, give.
- They never complained. I never heard, “oh my flight was so long and tiring” or “I don’t feel like going to this business meeting, what a drag”. Never. Ever. Not once.The lesson : Something that sucks, actually probably does reeeeally suck. But there is no point reminding myself and everyone else of the fact. Move on and do something that makes me feel better about it. Save the complaining for the psychologist.
- They looked after themselves. They booked me in to give them a remedial post flight massage or a post meeting massage because they wanted to feel better. They know that looking after mind, body and soul is the way to be happy and successful in life. Travelling long hours, staying in hotels away from family, no sleep, meeting with strangers constantly… I am sure that would be draining and they know they need to relax in order to cope with the demands put on them. The lesson : If I am feeling tired, stressed, sick or worn out…I will put fixing THAT as my first priority.
- They look good! They dress neat, brush their hair, brush their teeth and stand up straight. They care about the impression they make on others. The lesson : Dressing well, looking in the mirror and taking care of your appearance is not just a vanity thing. In fact, caring about what others think is not the problem, it is the attitude behind it. Are you dressing that way because you are afraid of what others might think and need to be accepted by them ? Or are you dressing that way because you know you are fabulous and respect others enough to give your best self to them? Remember when going on a date meant someone turning up at your door smelling gooooood, with their hair done and a white smile. How nice was it to know that someone made that effort for you? Stand tall, brush your hair, brush your teeth, exercise, smile and eat well. Show the people you meet, that you deserve their respect by being yourself and being your best self!
Taking time out for yourself and wanting to be a better person should not be ridden with guilt. You should not have to justify why, but instead look at your life; look at everything you do. You are far from being lazy or selfish for caring about yourself so take a break!
I am curious, what will you be doing to empower yourself this year?